A Day in the Life of a Sister

For the fifth installment of the “A Day in the Life of a Sister” article series, we feature Sister Melissa Cote of the Benedictine Sisters of Annunciation Monastery in Bismarck. Sister Melissa practices her ministry as a pharmacist at CHI St. Alexius Health and thrives in the support of her religious community.

Her work hours are erratic, demanding and critical to the patients she serves. Her home lies in the monastery where she finds the balance between serving God and being a healthcare provider.

Sister Melissa, a native of Rolla, N.D., describes her upbringing as typically Catholic growing up in small-town North Dakota. She is the fifth of eight children. “We went to church on Sunday and attended Sunday school. My parents were active in the church, but that was it,” she said.

“As a kid, I participated in almost everything because it was a small school. I was in band and choir and played basketball and volleyball. I worked at the grocery store. I was not exactly the athletic type, but I had fun.”

Cote earned good marks yet was undecided about her field. “It was kind of always around health care.”

“I was a senior in nursing when I switched my major to theology.”

When did you hear the calling to religious life?

That happened when I was at the University of Mary. I lived in a dorm that was connected to the old monastery. We ate at the same cafeteria as the sisters a lot of the time.

I remember being struck by this joyfulness that they had about them. I liked how they were always trying to carry each other’s trays and how they would serve one another.

I was sitting with some friends, and we were talking about the sisters and the lifestyle, and one friend said she could never do that. And, I said “I think I would like it.”

I couldn’t get the idea out of my head and got the courage to go talk to the sisters about it. 

I talked to the vocation director. I stayed with the sisters a weekend a month so they would get to know me a little bit and I could get to know them and their lifestyle a little bit more personally.

In my fifth year of college, I had become a postulant which is when you move into the monastery. That was when my official formation began. Then I continued my studies at the University of Mary and was attending prayers with the sisters. I had chores that I did with the sisters. For my formation, I would read articles and discuss them with the director and other sisters.

When did you make your final vows?

I became a novice in 2001. That would have been right after I graduated from University of Mary. I made my first profession in August of 2002. My final profession was on June 17, 2006.

How did you become a pharmacist with a theology degree?

I had most of the classes I needed for prepharmacy courses through nursing studies.

In nursing, I kind of got a feel for the medication end. I was interested in how it worked and the healing process. I discovered that I don’t like to be the one to give the shots. I figured dispensing them is better.

After I made my first profession, I became a pharmacy technician and did that for five years before I went to pharmacy school.

I made my final profession with the sisters before I went off to school (earning a doctorate in pharmacy—four years at Creighton University in Omaha, Neb.)

While away, I tried to be faithful to our daily prayer schedule as much as possible when I was there. I went to daily Mass most days. The sisters were fabulous. They sent cards and I got their emails. That helped a lot.”

What is an average day like for you?

There is none because my hours are so weird. But as for the sisters, we always have morning prayers before breakfast. Then, we have daily Eucharist. There are midday prayers before lunch. Then, we have evening prayers at 5 p.m.

After that, we go to supper. In the off time, people go to work and do chores or errands. In the evening, people get together to play cards, work on a puzzle or watch TV. 

I miss a lot of that because my work schedule is a little off. I work the day shift. I work the evening shift and when I’m unlucky, I work the night shift. In a hospital, there must be a pharmacist on duty all the time.

I consider my work to be part of the community. When I am not there, I know the sisters pray for me. I am there in spirit when I cannot be there in person.

Morning prayers start at 6:45 a.m. for the community. I try to get a few minutes in the morning. Probably, my biggest prayer time is in the evening because I am not quite so rushed. I give myself 15 minutes to get my own morning prayer if I can’t join the community. The drive to work is a good time for me.

This morning, I had to be at work at 5:30 a.m. It’s hard to get my prayers in before that.

How is your work a part of your ministry?

Pharmacy work is part of my ministry because CHI St. Alexius Health is one of the sisters’ sponsored institutions. I see it as being part of a healing ministry.

My paycheck goes directly to the community which is the way it works for all of us. A lot of the sisters work within the monastery itself—the formation of newer members, ongoing formation and the business office.

What is the application process for joining the community?

The first step would be to get ahold of the vocation director Sr. Idelle Badt who would have you come and visit the sisters. If you live nearby, you can visit the sisters once a month. If you come from further away, you could come for two or three weeks. 

That is for six months to a year. Then you could apply to become a postulant which is when you move into the monastery for another six months to a year. You would have a director, your person to turn to. They would give you articles to read and have conferences with you.

After that, you would request to become a novice and that would require a year of more intense study of the Benedictine life. At this point, you cannot have an outside job or go to school outside of the monastery.

According to church law, that must be at least a year. Following that, you can make a first profession. That would be a three-year commitment to the sisters.

With that, you could go outside the monastery and get a job possibly. You would learn how to find an outside ministry and live the monastic life together and how to integrate that. You would still have a director to be your contact person. You can renew that up to another three years. After that, you would make your final profession.

For your first profession and final profession, the sisters vote on whether they accept you. We would have a meeting and you would request to take that step.

How else do you minister?

I started to mentor with a group called BIO Girls—Beautiful Inside and Out. It’s for second through sixth-grade girls. It’s a faith-based program to help young girls develop a sense of worth and self-confidence. It’s a great program. I’ve been doing that for the past few years.

Some of my evangelizing has come through exercise, specifically running. Running has expanded my world a little bit. I run with the group RADD—Running Against Destructive Decisions—on Saturday mornings. That’s for people in recovery from addiction.

What is the apostolate of the monastery?

Prayer and living community life is basically what our main apostolate is. Through that, we respond to what is needed at that time. The sisters came as a group, and they lived their monastic life and responded to the call of needs in western North Dakota. There was a need for schools and hospitals, so they started that. But the main thing they did was really to pray.

What do you do for fun?

Most of my free time is running. I train for marathons on occasion. I also enjoy reading, playing cards, doing puzzles or just sitting outside.

The Benedictines' roots go back some 130 years here—pioneering educational, medical and spiritual institutions and founding their own monastery 75 years ago. What is being a part of their legacy meant to you?

I see it as a blessing and kind of a challenge to continue to respond to the call and the needs of the times.

We sponsor the CHI St. Alexius Health and the University of Mary. They are kind of self-sufficient now. We also now sponsor Ministry on the Margins. The challenge continues to be exciting—where can we serve now? What is the need now? How can we help fulfill that need?

It’s been life changing. The opportunity to grow closer to God and seek God with others. Doing it alone is hard. Having the community there to support you and be there with you through it all is very, very helpful. Just having that rhythm of prayer and constantly calling you back to God.

I think our community life is such a great example of how society could possibly strive to be. The concepts of dialogue …. Being open to different points of view.

The sisters have such depth, such a story, and the idea that I get to be a part of that, I think is amazing. I feel truly blessed. I hope to one day be that beacon of encouragement for other people—whether it’s someone inside our religious community or outside.

Having those examples of faithfulness in our community every day is helpful.