Deeper significance of sacrifice

“Let us remember that love lives through sacrifice and is nourished by giving. Without sacrifice, there is no love.” — St. Maximilian Kolbe

Lent is a profoundly beautiful season, and thus it calls upon the heart and soul to do profoundly beautiful things for God and others. Families can receive the graces that the Lenten season has to offer in a uniquely powerful way.

Lent begins with Ash Wednesday on Feb. 22 and, within the Catholic faith, it’s about so much more than just meatless Fridays. Monique Kraemer, a parishioner of St. Hildegard in Menoken offered some family traditions to make this penitential season a bit more meaningful.
           
Family traditions

“My husband Peter’s family had an empty canning jar that they filled with dry beans, and each bean represented a sacrifice that was made by one of the family members,” Monique explained. “On Good Friday, the beans were used in the bean soup for supper. If not enough sacrifices were made, it made for a scarce amount of soup on Good Friday. This was meaningful because it encouraged them to be intentional about sacrificing, and it put a 'quantity' to it. It was also a given that sweets were given up for the entirety of Lent, except for Sundays.”
           
In the end, the sacrifices that Peter's parents (Phil and Laurie) made, have brought forth bountiful fruit for the Kingdom of God, as their family continues to grow and flourish, both in size and in faith. They are also grateful for the priesthood of one of their sons, Fr. Matthew Kraemer of the Diocese of Fargo.
           
Looking back, Monique appreciates the Lenten family devotions that her family took part in as well. 
           
“When I was growing up, we went to Mass, had a simple supper and prayed the Stations of the Cross every Friday during Lent,” she said.
           
Now as a homeschooling family with six children, Peter and Monique strive to carry on the Catholic traditions that were handed on to them, as well as enjoy additional ones.
           
“Our family continues this tradition by having a simple, meatless supper at home and then praying the Stations of the Cross at home,” Monique remarked. “We have a few different Stations of the Cross booklets, so we ‘change it up’ each week. We also have a set of small station figurines for the children to follow along with.”
           
As parents and the “first teachers” of the Catholic faith to their children, they savor the opportunity to help their children embrace the true spirit of Lent.
           
“As a family, we choose something to do in each area of prayer, fasting and alms giving. Peter and I and the older children also add our own goals. One tradition that we will continue this year during Lent is to give the children opportunities to do extra chores or cleaning tasks that are monetized. At the end of Lent, the children may choose the charity that they will donate their money to.”
           
When asked why she believes it is essential for children to have tangible activities that they can do to grow in their spiritual lives, Monique explained, “We all learn well through tangible activities. It’s difficult to only sit and pray, and not necessarily what God calls us to do. We are called to make our daily activities a prayer, to do them well and offer them to God. The Church in her wisdom gives us seasons. Perhaps one of the most fruitful seasons is the penitential season, which leads up to the central event in our salvation—the Resurrection! How much we need to be reminded every year (in tangible ways) to repent and be made whole by Christ.”
           
Parental example

Father John Paul Gardner, Parochial Vicar of Cathedral of the Holy Spirit in Bismarck, and Fr. Paul Gardner, Parochial Vicar of Spirit of Life Parish in Mandan and Chaplain of St. Mary’s Academy, also have a deeply edifying testimony to share of how their parents inspired them to fully live out the Catholic Faith as a family.
           
“Thanks to the diligent piety of our parents, Daniel and Maureen, our family did many devotional practices,” Fr. John Paul said. “Throughout the year, we all went to Mass and helped serve, prayed the rosary, prayed the Stations of the Cross individually, and said meal prayers. We had a weekly holy hour and would abstain from meat each Friday.”
           
For the Gardner family of nine children, the Lenten season was especially meaningful.
           
“We would give up all desserts and sweets for Lent as a family, and snacks were generally not allowed either,” Fr. Paul remembers. “We would pray the formal Stations of the Cross on Fridays at our parish. We both served for the stations, so we actually had to carry the cross with Jesus in a more tangible way. It was a special privilege carrying the cross during the stations, and I think we each relished that opportunity to more tangibly meditate on the carrying of the cross with Christ.”
           
Each year during Lent, the Gardners also renewed their spiritual lives by giving up all television and movies, occasionally visiting nursing home residents, and going to confession even more regularly than usual.
           
Self-sacrifice

“These Lenten spiritual practices gave us a sense of the importance of self-denial—not just for ourselves, but also for the sake of others and for the poor souls,” Fr. Paul said. “So much of wanting to become a priest is about having a great desire for the salvation of souls, and I think our Lenten practices helped make us aware of that. Children are more capable of self-sacrifice than we expect and learning self-denial as a child is key.”

When asked about the deeper significance of sacrifice in Catholic life, Fr. John Paul reflected, “We often think about Lenten sacrifices in terms of giving up stuff—yet the word sacrifice means to make something holy, to sanctify it. It is a big temptation for modern Catholics to separate their spiritual/Church lives from their ‘personal lives.’ Making sacrifices is a way to bring Christ into the ordinary moments of our ‘personal lives’ and to sanctify the whole of life.”  
           
According to Fr. John Paul, asceticism is essential to obtaining the abundant joy that God has in store for the Christian soul.        
           
“Self-denial teaches us that happiness is more than about having whatever we want, whenever we want it. Happiness lies in being united to God, not just in Heaven, but even here and now on earth. On the cross, Jesus was certainly suffering, but faith teaches us that even there, in some mysterious way, He was still experiencing the joy of being united with the Father. So it is with us. Self-denial is not about giving up happiness but giving up the selfishness that keeps us from deeper happiness.”