When Father Christopher (Chris) Kadrmas thought that God might be calling him to the priesthood, he had a few things to check off his do-to list first: break off his engagement, finish college and work as an occupational therapist. In truth, Fr. Kadrmas was hoping that God would leave him alone seeing as he had a different sort of life planned.
Growing up in Bowman with two younger brothers, the idea of a vocation occasionally crossed his mind, but he was a boy from a good Catholic family, so didn’t everyone at least consider such a call? Under the influence of his parents who were both teachers—his father in science and mother in English—he was open to all sorts of ideas.
“I had a great sense of wonder and awe for the world,” Fr. Kadrmas explained, “from how to do cross-stitch to astrophysics and religions.” It was religion, he felt, that made sense of it all, binding all that was in the world together.
It seems that his boyhood thoughts were not always those of just a regular boy. “I thought of myself as a little different,” Fr. Kadrmas said. “For instance, I remember when reading
All Quiet on the Western Front, I could feel the pathos—the whole human suffering—and contemplated, why are we here? My friends could not get into it.”
College life
While attending the University of North Dakota and majoring in Occupational Therapy (O.T.), Fr. Kadrmas enjoyed getting to know the priest at the Newman Center who shared many of his same interests in science and philosophy. There was also a cute girl that he met at the Newman Center who had gotten his attention. She was the kind you would be proud to bring home to meet your parents. They fell in love and before too long, he proposed. She said yes. “And now that I’ve made this choice, God will shut up and I’ll live happily ever after,” Fr. Kadrmas determined.
He kept praying and being open to God’s direction, because as a good Catholic, he did not imagine that any decision of his would override God’s. Still, it seemed things were settled now.
“But God didn’t shut up,” Father Kadrmas said. Instead, the knock at his door grew ever louder—pounding. “This is very disconcerting when there is a ring on a finger,” he said.
It was certainly awkward, and he didn’t want to hurt the one he loved. But she had a brother who was a priest. She would understand. Still, such things are never easy. “Once we broke up, we had to make it permanent,” Fr. Kadrmas said. “We couldn’t continue being friends. It would not work with my discernment.” Yet, a trusted priest advised him not to immediately run off to the seminary. Answering God’s call should take time and discernment, the priest counseled, and not be influenced by emotions and rash decisions.
Occupational therapy
Father Kadrmas finished school, graduating in December of 1992. Although God was not relenting on the call, it seemed a good idea to put his O.T. degree to work. No one would hire someone for only six months—the time he had before the next seminary class began—so Fr. Kadrmas added a year to that. “During interviews, I let them know I had this seminary thing going on and the most I could give was 18 months,” he said. “If I stayed any longer, I would get comfortable and fall in love again and not go.”
Father Kadrmas had female friends, but he let them know he was going to the seminary. “I was going to give myself a year at the seminary and figured I would convince God [that] this is a really stupid idea,” he said.
During his college internships, he had been especially drawn to the psychological side of occupational therapy. There are types of adaptations needed due to loss of physical abilities, and there are also psychological issues that cause people to struggle with everyday functioning. Father Kadrmas took a job at a psychiatric hospital in the Midwest, helping people who had been diagnosed with that depression, anxiety, bipolar and schizophrenia. There were team meetings with nurses and therapists.
“I would run activities during the day that would help patients in their skills and observe them and how they were progressing, especially with medications,” he said. “The patients participated in group discussions and group projects, such as planning and executing a simple collage from magazines with simple instructions—which often revealed a lot about individual patients.” In some ways, Fr. Kadrmas described his work as being a life coach, helping people become more stable, recognize stressors and seek ways to function better.
The priesthood
The work was meaningful for him, but in the fall of 1994, seminary awaited Fr. Kadrmas. He entered the Pontifical College Josephinum in Columbus, Ohio with an open mind and heart, although not expecting to be a long-timer. “But it grew on me,” he said. “I found it fascinating. The world of the Church opened up to me.” He felt continual reassurance that he was meant to be there.
In 2000, Fr. Kadrmas was ordained with five other men. Coincidentally, all six men had gotten degrees for other careers prior to joining the seminary and five of them had actually worked in those fields for a time.
His education and experience in O.T. often helps him in the priesthood, such as talking with people and calming them, and giving referrals while also blending in the spirituality. Father Kadrmas pointed out that there’s no shame in needing counseling once in a while. “Everyone, at some time in life can probably use it—be it for divorce, miscarriage or behavioral issues with your child,” he said. “I try to tell people that if you are too proud to ever have counseling, that’s a weakness, and then you are too proud to get married.”
Father Kadrmas is actually personally involved in marriages. He became involved in marriage tribunal work in 2002 and is currently the Judicial Vicar for the Diocese of Bismarck and in residence at the Church of Saint Anne in Bismarck. His role as judicial vicar entails preparing, studying and judging pleas for nullity of marriages, to determine if they were valid or not. According to him, his past experience and education often helps give insights into behaviors and the relationships he investigates.
At 50 years of age, having been a priest for 19 years now, Fr. Kadrmas watches as many of his peers have become grandparents. He rests assured that the priesthood is what he was meant to do.
“Not only for myself but for others,” he said. “I’m trying to work out my salvation, too, but also helping others and feeding my love of awe and wonder through the priesthood. I find also that the person of Jesus is the window to the Father and the window to humanity, too; it goes both ways up and down.”